Late Breaking News!!!

The True Champion of Today’s Wrestling News!™


Insider Headquarters – Richmond, VA
Volume 3, Issue 4

Late Breaking News

At the annual meeting of the Dark Powers United, it was announced earlier today that within the DPU, there will be “factions” created! These faction groups will incorporate their own goals in the EWF, other than total domination of the Federation.

The wrestler who is responsible for this is Ahab "The Mad Arab" Muhammed. He had expressed his anger during this meeting for being kicked out of the DPU after losing to the pathetic Calypso King (Not Kevin King), just to be invited back into the EWF again. Feeling that there was no assurance from the powers above, he had suggested that these factions be formed.

The factions will still be listed under the DPU name, but the factions will govern themselves in the new EWF. The Wrestling Insider will continue to follow all of these wrestlers. Here are all of the DPU wrestlers that will be in the EWF and their new factions:


Ahab "The Mad Arab" Muhammed: Faction – The Foreign X-Change The Mad Saudi has declared Holy War on the entire J.A.I.L.Mate stable because of what he called “the lowest point of my wrestling career!” Ahab’s past accomplishments was the PEWF Triple Threat Championship, and he is looking forward to retiring his taxi cab hack license and getting back into the ring. – Ahab Quote: “After losing to the King, I had hit rock bottom…but Allah will help me kick Mate ass!” Ahab’s signature move is Lakum A Salaam (And Peace Be With You!!!).

Lloyd "The Chosen One" Nathans: Faction – Champions Emeritus Hails from Daytona Beach, Florida. Nathan’s is one of the EWF Original Members. From the EWF’s infancy, Lloyd Nathans was usually the underdog in all of his fights. But that did not stop him from being the first EWF World Champion. Nor did it stop him from being a Three Time EWF World Champion, EWF Caribbean Champion, EWF Tag Team Champion, and the PEWF Barb Wire Champion. The Chosen One feels that he has been hand-picked to bring down the Brotherhood of Sanchez at all costs. Nathan Quote: “I will bring down the Brotherhood between tans…nah, it won’t even take that long!” Nathan’s signature move is Against All Odds.

Osiris: Faction – Champions Emeritus After the dissolve of the Federation, The Big O gave the PEWF World Championship that he retained to Ruddy Ruddy Mitchell as a tribute to him. “I would still be fighting underground matches, beating the piss out of El Condor and the Mexicutioner if it wasn’t for Mitch!” Originally for Brooklyn, NY, The Big O has agreed to come back to the EWF to assist his old friend The Chosen One. His past accomplishments include being the PEWF World Champion, PWA World Champion, and a Two Time PWA West Indian Champion. The Big O Quote: “I will continue here where I left off in the last Federation – Kicking some Old School!” Osiris’ signature move is the Omega Effect.

Simon Youngblood Priest: Faction – TriBoro Trinity Not much is known form the man from These Harlem Streets. What is known is this: He was at one time a member of The Illuminati, but his utter hatred for the wrestler named Darkside had forced him to join another stable. Titles are not his current agenda – he is out for Darkside’s blood. He agreed to join the other members of the TriBoro Trinity, and loves to play the role of “enforcer.” Priest Quote: “I DO hope that Darkside takes this ass kicking personally. Bitches with glass jaws should play the sideline!!!” Simon’s signature move is The Bastard Maker.

Ten Bears: Faction – None. Ten Bears is the only wrestler that chose not to join any other faction. Now residing in Sioux City, Iowa, Ten Bears has one rival - Cliff Blue Skyy. Ten Bears wants to beat out Cliff in everything – Ten Bears wants to hold titles before Cliff, wants to hold titles longer than Cliff , wants to be World Champion before Cliff, and wants to beat Cliff in the ring, whenever it counts, at all times. In the previous EWF, he held the EWF Hardcore Championship. Ten Bears “I said it before and I’ll say it again…Cliff Blue Skyy is truly the Fake Ass Indian!” Ten Bears’ signature move is called the Peace Pipe.

TesMiNuh: Faction – TriBoro Trinity Originally from Kingston, Jamaica, now residing in Jamaica, Queens. TesMiNuh has not been in the squared circle since the closing of the federations. Instead, he has been travelling on cruise ships, performed many of his classic dancehall hits which include “Caan Getta Title Shot? Wat De Bloodclot” and “Icicle Dem Melt.” When hearing about the new EWF, he was more than ready to get back in. TesMiNuh feels that he should have had all of the titles that Piragua won in all of the other federations. He believes that he has been stepped over because: 1. he is Jamaican and hardly understood, and 2. It was a Latino conspiracy. Past accomplishments include the BEST CARIBBEAN CHAMPION EVER, voted by the fans, as well as a Three Time EWF Caribbean Champion. TesMiNuh Quote: “Me fraid? Gway! Rude Bwoy nuh fear no one! Dat anti-man Piragua haffi ded tonite!!” TesMiNuh’s signature move is the Dunn’s River Fall.

Twu Buw Kuw: Faction – The Foreign X-Change The Ivory Coast King has decided that since Ahab going after the J.A.I.L.Mate stable, he will tackle something that would be even easier: The Illuminati. Twu wants The Illuminati to look worse than the 2008 Detroit Lions. Twu Buw Kuw believes that the only thing that this stable is good for is to get easy wins from and making food runs to McDonald’s. His past accomplishment was winning the EWF Caribbean Championship. Twu’s Quote: “Way too stormy for Thunder and Lightning….Rico, ain't no Sunshine around here, Suave…..And it is time to put Chris on Ice….” Twu signature move is The Native Cross.

Vic Tory: Faction – TriBoro Trinity From the Bronx! Tory has continued keeping in great shape, knowing that this day would come: Another shot at getting a title and defending it consecutively, unlike any of the Mastermindz! Tory’s disdain for the Mastermindz starts from the bottom wrestler (???) to the most famous jobbers - Pimp Daddy And L.T.Z.. Vic Tory’s past accomplishments include the PEWF West Indian Championship and the PWA Brian Pillman Triple Threat Championship. Tory’s Quote: “Every Woman’s Fantasy? Now that is a fucking joke, yo….but I’ll catch up wid u later…and I’ma beat dat ass…Homo Thug looking mother fuckers….” Tory’s signature move is Victorious.




Ruddy
Ruddy
Mitchell
©